Oh, Ye Of Little Faith...

As many of you following this probably know, I have a terrible fear of flying - it is actually not so much the flying, as it is the crashing that scares me. When really feeling the Lord calling me on this past trip to China - that was my biggest hurdle. There was no way I was going to go if I did not believe without a shadow of a doubt that He was going with me and was in it all the way. He repeatedly confirmed this and although I was comforted knowing this, I was scared to death. In fact, the last week I really didn't know if I could go through with it. I didn't feel that it was a Jonah and the whale type thing if I didn't go but that God really wanted to bless me and I was going to miss that if I didn't go.

Well, bless me He did - it was an incredible trip, my heart and mind are still trying to sort through all that He allowed us to witness, along with still what our next step is to be. I believe an amazing door has been opened for our church and for us in supporting PHF and these children. I have definitely been taking to heart more of the verses regarding the fatherless in the Bible and don't really see it as an option but as an incredible blessing.

Anyway, many of you may have heard by now that our flight back from Beijing was anything but uneventful. The five of us had gathered in the airport before boarding and prayed for safe travel and I specifically prayed for "no bumps". It was raining slightly when we boarded the plane and shortly after take off we were experiencing alot of turbulance and it seemed to last forever. Needless to say, I'm not proud of losing my composure but I lost it. I don't know if I have ever been more afraid in my life. I remember praying for it to just stop and wondering why He was continually allowing this - why wouldn't He make it stop? I then remember my prayers going up for my wonderful husband and kids and wanting them to be okay and for God to take care of them.

Well, it did stop. The remainder of the flight was good although I was still under alot of stress - it was a long flight and I was fearful we could experience it again - I just wanted to be on the ground and seriously contemplated taking a rental car from Chicago to home; but, all is well, and we arrived safely home.

Since then, I have really been questioning God - He knew my fear, why did He allow this to happen to me? If He had truly called me and He loves me so much, why didn't He allow it to be smooth sailing all the way - no problems, no fears - nothing but perfection, peace, and calm? We had specifically prayed "no bumps" and we got big bumps, alot of bumps, scary, heart-pounding bumps. This has honestly been going thru my head ever since and I have really been questioning my faith and His plan, His motives, His love - the whole bit.

This morning I took my children to See You At The Pole at their school (I'm so proud of them) and was travelling back home alone thinking through all of this again and was reminded of Mark 4:35-41. Jesus and His disciples had boarded a ship and He said, 'Let us pass over unto the other side'. A great storm arose - the disciples thought they were going to die and wondered if Jesus even cared as He slept on a pillow (I believe that means it was an intentional nap - He literally grabbed a pillow, got comfortable, and took a nap - knowing full well this storm was going to come.) The disciples woke Him up and He rebuked the storm (I believe the storm was from Satan, because Jesus wouldn't rebuke Himself or the will of the Father) - the winds ceased and there was a great calm. Jesus then asked them why they were so fearful and how could they have no faith.

Wow, I really thought about that. Jesus had told me to go to the other side of the world - I believe He promised me He would get me there and back safely. A great storm came and rocked our plane all over the place and just like the disciples, I was wondering if He even cared? I remember even wondering if He was listening to me - kind of like, was He asleep and not paying attention? Where was my faith? If Jesus tells you, He wants you to go to the other side - He will see to it that you get there. Amen! He is faithful even when we are not - He was faithful in answering my questions, giving me peace that He was there all the time, in full control. Thank you, Lord, for helping my unbelief.

There's No Place Like Home

We are safe and sound back in the States. I truly
love this country and probably appreciate it much more now - don't get me wrong, China was unbelievable...the people, the food, the culture, the architecture, the history, the scenery...I could go on and on - it was amazing. Everyone, and I do mean everyone, we came into contact with was very friendly and full of smiles - I honestly hope our own people are just as nice to those visiting from other countries. I went over very apprehensive, not knowing what to expect, but it was incredibly pleasant and welcoming.

I woke up this afternoon, yeah you read right - this afternoon, and my thoughts immediately went to my team. I have woken up with them the past several mornings and spent nearly every waking hour with them for the last 10 days. They were great and there for me more than they know - they definitely saw my vulnerable side more often than I would like to admit. I pray a great bond has developed between each one of us - we always have China. Thanks to them and many blessings - I believe each one of us brought something unique to this trip - I was probably there to remind them of their mortality and they were there to continually remind me of my immortality in Christ.

My next thoughts quickly went to the children and what time it was there - what are they doing now? At that time, they should've all been sleeping - but I thought about their schedules...I could hear their little voices and see them saying "Mamma", trying to get their nanny's attention. Of course, I was wondering about Moses and how he was doing and what he was doing. Wow - they were incredible kids and what an incredible place. Please pray for each one of these little ones and all of the staff - they need continued support and great families, full of love, for them to be a part of .

Thanks again to everyone for the prayers and encouraging emails and comments. You were there with us and we tried to make you part as much as we could. God bless you every one.

Headed Home!

We are wrapping up our day - Wendy will probably still update the team blog later but then we are going to get everything packed. We get up early in the morning, go to church, eat lunch, and then off to the airport. I am excited about going to church in China - even if it is state sanctioned - that is going to be neat. Please remember us for safe travel and no problems. This has been an incredible experience. Thank you!

We had a great time with the kids again this morning and we passed out their goodie bags - they loved that - we also had taken pictures of each one of them, cut them out, and placed them inside clear medallions they could wear around their necks. We had shared with them how special they were - the medallions ended it well and they love to see pictures of themselves. Everytime you snap a picture - they want you to show them the digital screen - even the nannies think that is cool.

It has been an emotional day, which we expected, but it still doesn't make it any easier. I hope we have made an impact on them but they have definitely made an impact on us.

Thanks to everyone - we will be home soon!

Yum-Yum!!

We had a great time today with the kids - several pictures on the team blog. We had a ring toss game for them and they loved it. We decorated visors and passed out smiley face necklaces but the highlight for them was lunch...McDonald's. We were talking amongst ourselves that we had never seen that many hamburgers disappear so fast. My little guy, Moses, is deaf (possibly) and would take a bite of his sandwich and then rub his tummy for "yum-yum". They have of course had McDonalds before but they don't get it very often at all so it is quite a treat.

Later in the afternoon, after we had gone to Wal-Mart - yep, I can't even get away from it here - Wendy had bought some cookies for the kiddos, so while her and Karen took those around, Misty and I spent some time in the clinic with Dr. Moody doing some cleaning. It was great talking with her - she has such a faithful heart and genuine concern for the children here. Just in case there is some confusion, both Mr. & Mrs. Moody are doctors...it was Mrs. Moody we worked with this afternoon. She is quite funny and has a different accent so it is really neat to talk with her.

Well, tomorrow is our last full day here - I am sure it will be quite bittersweet - our conversations have really been about 'what's next?' - not just for us but for you also - it is something to think about - I know it has me thinking - I mean what was all of this for? And what am I to do with what I have been given?

"To whom much is given, much is required" (Luke 12:48)

Hmmmmmmm.

Thank You...Thank You...Thank You

I have received several encouraging emails which have helped a lot knowing you are praying for us and for everyone and everything that is involved here - it really is an incredible task; overwhelming actually. I feel much better emotionally today so thank you very, very much.

Today was a touring day and there is a lot more info regarding that on our team blog. Also be sure to check out one of our other team members blogs, The Love of Family (a link is in the margin). She is updating and uploading pictures also.

We were gone all day so did not get to spend hardly any time with the children - I found myself missing them, especially Moses, but we have a great day planned with them tomorrow. Story time is going well, they already know some of our typical children songs, and a few know sign language and sign while they sing. We start our day with singing and story time then move on to crafts and games. In addition to that, tomorrow we are having a McDonald's party for lunch - they are going to love that.

Wendy mentioned on our team blog just how precious it is to see them excited to see us. It really is heart-tugging. They spot us and start pulling on their nannies and pointing to us. When we get closer, they run to us and just want to be loved on and played with. They are amazingly well behaved, sitting very calmly and listening intently during story time and minding their nannies, doing exactly as they are told immediately. We were talking about the simple things that catch their attention - they don't have nearly the high tech gadgets that entertain our children back home - they can occupy themselves with just about anything. One child in the group I team up with, was just tickled to pull grass, throw it in the air, and watch it fall to the ground - if it landed on me or one of the other children, she was even more enthralled. We played with bubbles one day and they had a blast chasing them and trying to pop them.

Well, again, thank you for the prayers - I made it on that silly air car up to the Great Wall - which I still can not believe I did; I almost didn't. I honestly kept my eyes closed the whole time - Ruth prayed over me, which was very much appreciated, and she video taped the incredible scenery for me since I couldn't see it (my eyes were seriously closed the whole time and I had no strength in my arms when we got off because I had clinched the bar so tightly all the way up). It was a breath taking view and just an incredible icon to view and take in.

That is all for now - keep the encouraging words and prayers coming.

Please Pray

There are a lot of things going on - 3 children leave this weekend to prepare to meet their new adoptive families - that is a praise. Misty May, the one week old baby that was left at the front gate the first night we were here, had to leave earlier today for another orphanage - PHF now has 2 months to find her biological family; I don't really understand all of the technicalities of that but they are requesting prayer. And I will be honest I am just feeling overwhelmed with everything - it is hard to explain but today was a pretty emotional day for me - just trying to sort a lot of things out - I have asked a lot of "why's?" lately.

Tomorrow is our second and last touring day and I was really excited about it until I heard we have to take an air car up to the Great Wall. This morning in my quiet time, I read in Ecclesiastes 12 that the people were afraid of heights and dangers on the road - well, they are all about heights here and if you've ever driven here you would understand the latter. I shared this passage with the others and we had a good laugh since last night we tried to cross the street at a very busy intersection - it was scary - did I mention they don't have traffic lights? I was told traffic is to flow like water, you just make room - oh yeah, it's fun.

We did have a good day today - we split up for the most part and did different things as requested - there is more info regarding that and more pictures uploaded on the team blog. I am sure more will be posted tomorrow - just remember us in prayer - He is sovereign, sees all, and knows each individual need in more depth than we do. Thank you.

Meet Moses

I have made several new little friends but one little guy, Moses (pictured), has really tugged at my heart and I think I have his also. He just lights up when I come around now and wants to sit on my lap the whole time - if he gets up for any period of time at all and another little one climbs up - he is very upset and trying to pull them off.

Today, we worked in the craft store - tracing and cutting out shapes. The orphanage has a craft store in which they make hand-made crafts to purchase as a fundraiser. (You can check out more on their website - a link is in the margin). We also helped clean the school - the older kids had gone on a field trip to the paralympic games. A couple of our ladies went on rounds with the doctor here and I think they are planning on going with him tomorrow to the hospital to check in on some little ones that are there from the orphanage.

Thanks to every one for the comments and emails - I am loving them and really look forward every evening to logging on and hearing from home.

Sweet Aroma

Our team blog summarizes our day pretty well and has some pictures posted so please check it out. I just wanted to share a little bit of what God has shared with me. Yesterday one of the locals I was standing close to told me I smelled good - I thought that was nice - and shocking - since I was very hot and "glistening"... a lot. Anyway, this morning while thinking about many different things and some of the hindrances/barriers - I was reminded of this gracious compliment and then how in our daily lives we are to be a sweet fragrance...a pleasing aroma...to our Lord - that's possibly the greatest compliment of all.

Greetings from China

Okay, first of all, I am here - in China - can you believe that? I am in China...Wow! Plus, what is even more amazing than that - I flew here. And just as I knew He would - He gave me peace and a great flight. I was though absolutely beat when we finally got to our destination. If you remember, I was up at 2:00am typing on my blog just a few short hours before our first flight - I was up for almost 48 hours - with only a few short naps on the plane.

This morning we got up early - 4:00am the time here - and 4:00am feels the same here as it does back home - and if anyone reading this knows me very well - mornings are not my thing. In my quiet time this morning I was reading out of I Corinthians 16 and verse 19 says..."The churches of the Asian province greet you." That blew me away - I am in Asia - and the church here greets me - I'm telling you that was for me - pretty cool.

Today was a tour day and incredible - we had a great time checking out the sights and doing some shopping - I actually bartered and think I did pretty well - but shopping here is nothing like home - you don't know a salesperson until you've come here.

For lunch we ate at KFC which just cracks me up.

We have had some pretty cool things happen and we will share more about that later - check out the team blog. We got to meet some of the children later today with their nannies, we also met the director, and the doctor - amazing people with absolutely incredible hearts. The kids were full of smiles and wanted to play and be held - their faces just lit up when we showed up to meet them.

Tomorrow will be a day of working here. The team blog does have a couple pictures posted so be sure to follow along there.

Here We Go!

Well, it is about 2:00am and I am still awake - still getting things ready to go. In about 24 hours from now we will be landing in Beijing - that is unbelievable. I will try to keep up this blog as much as I can; however, be sure to check out the team blog posted in the margin - When Love Takes Flight.

My family has been great - I am going to miss you like crazy but thank you for letting me go. I am anticipating great and awesome things. Please keep all of us in your prayers - I especially need an extra dose of peace since flying is not at all my cup of tea. Perfect love casts out fear, right? Well, I know Love because He first loved us and am trusting Him for everything.

God Bless - talk to all of you soon.

In His Image

Well, we are getting very close - 3 days. It has been incredible seeing God put everything together; He has been teaching me so much about His character and my own. I am a very analytical thinker - always asking the question "why?" - and known for even asking God questions with multiple choice answers (just in case He hasn't thought of all the possibilities). One of the things I seem to question and deal with regularly is "why is it always me being worked on?". For example, I go to the grocery store and there are numerous carts left all over the lot blocking available parking spaces and posing a potential hazard to cars if they happen to roll away - I park, get out, proceed to the front of the store - all the while passing these uncaroulled carts - and I feel it...'go caroul the carts'. An inner argument ensues because I don't want to caroul the carts and I keep going on; nonetheless, always to turn back and grab the carts. Why me? Why doesn't God convict the other people, preferably the ones that can't seem to walk their carts the few extra feet to their appropriate places.

I also seem to frequently come into contact with people with the same personality traits - yeah, I know, my own - anyway, it is continual and I honestly don't handle it well. I know 'iron sharpens iron' but obviously, or so it would seem, I'm not getting any sharper no matter how often and fast He strikes us together. I fail repeatedly and wish He would just move on to the next test, or maybe, just give me a break for a while - a long while.

But you know, honestly, I wouldn't want God to take a break from me and I am getting a little sharper - I'm sure not as fast as I could if I would just stop fighting Him all the way. I was walking the other evening and having one of these 'why?' moments with God and realized everytime He gives me something to work on He is showing me who He is - Jesus would put the carts up...without arguing about it and throwing a fit - Jesus handles every kind of personality with grace and love...patience...kindness - He doesn't lose His temper or fly off the handle. I am constantly being worked on because there is so much to work on. I am to be transformed into His image and He has promised to continue working that out in me (Phil. 1:6). My greatest desire is to know Him - and I pray for that. I want to know Him - everything about Him and I want my instantaneous responses to be Him and He is answering me. I am seeing who He is - His character, His actions, His love - everytime He gives me something to work on, He is showing me the character He wants me to have - His.

Happy Birthday, Grandma

On August 31, my grandmother turned 90 - WOW! She is still as spry as ever, full of wit and Irish fervor. We had a party for her with dinner, cake, and a gorilla stripper (yeah, you read right) - it was a lot of fun. We hired a guy to dress in a gorilla costume and strip the clothes off that were on over the costume - he danced to "I'm Too Sexy For My Shirt" - I think she got a little embarrassed. Love you Grandma - I hope you had a great time.